On the final day of my trip to New York (that would be the final full day, of course. Each way on the train is a full day in and of itself), Aunt TC and I hopped the Metro North down to the Bronx, wherein lies Fordham University, the bastion of intellectual discourse where my aunt is employed as head of archives and special collections. Many readers have likely heard of the Bronx, the borough north of Manhattan.

Emilia's in Little Italy of the Bronx

The Bronx is just as fascinating a place as Manhattan. In and of itself, the Bronx is at least the size of Pittsburgh (depending on how much of the metro area "counts" as Pittsburgh). The Metro North station in the Bronx will let you off right across the street from Fordham, a Jesuit university with a plethora of old-world-looking stone buildings and patches of greenery on a peaceful campus. The area of Bronx immediately surrounding this iron-gated oasis of higher learning is rather like a more grandiose version of Wood Street. I had been to Fordham before, so rather than a tour proper, we just stopped by to chat briefly with a few of my aunt's co-workers that I'd met on previous trips. One of her co-workers in the archives department, Vivian, took us to lunch a few blocks away from campus in the Little Italy of the Bronx. Keep them straight, now, there's one Little Italy in Manhattan and another Little Italy in the Bronx. While I can't claim to be an expert on the proper borders of either one, the impression I've gotten just from strolling around is that the Bronx Little Italy is larger than the Manhattan version. We ended up at Emilia's, a sit-down, white tablecloth Italian restaurant where we had all three gone once before on a previous visit. They have a $12 lunch special wherein one can choose from all the items on the special menu for one flat price. Aunt TC got the grilled salmon over arugala, one of her favorites at Emilia's, Vivian got the Chicken Daniela, and I selected the Baby Ravioli Raimondo (this was pre-low-carb for me) billed as having a pesto sauce with arugala, sundried tomatoes, roasted red peppers and walnuts. When I actually got the ravoli, it did not appear to have anything but pesto sauce.

My fake fake Channel sunglasses

Upon second glace, I spotted flecks of red in the pesto and realized that all the other ingredients had been blended into the pesto. Not such a terrible strategy, certainly, but the result was that the pesto tasted largely like pesto. Not the worst fate that could befall a person at lunch, but I would have preferred to have larger chunks of all the non-pesto ingredients so better to appreciate their flavors. After lunch, we sauntered up to an Italian grocery where Aunt TC bought a bottle of her favorite olive oil. Before getting on the train, we stopped by the outdoor market where vendors sell a number of items from watches to novelties. Though my knock-off funds were mostly exhausted from our trip to Chinatown the previous Friday, I did pick up a pair of fake fake Channel sunglasses for $5. They are "fake fake," and not "real fake," of course, because the circles on the side are complete and are not actual Channel C's.

Proof of Trader Joe's tenure in Scarsdale

While visiting my aunt in New York, I also had the opportunity to experience the grocery store Trader Joe's, New York-style. Perhaps some day there will be no difference between Trader Joe's New York-style and Trader Joe's Pittsburgh-style, but as it currently stands, our one measly little Trader Joe's in Pittsburgh is only a taste of what Trader Joe's offers in other cities. While our Trader Joe's is barely a year old, the Trader Joe's in Scarsdale, near my aunt's apartment, has been there since 1996. In fact, it was when my aunt first went with a friend to the Trader Joe's in Scarsdale that she was inspired to learn how to drive. For years in Pittsburgh, and then living the Bronx and finally in Bronxville, Aunt TC had never felt the need to buy a car or even get a driver's license, but after one trip to Trader Joe's... driving lessons, license and car followed in swift succession. If only we'd had a Trader Joe's earlier in Pittsburgh, maybe she wouldn't have beaten me to having a driver's license by two weeks! While Aunt TC claims that the Scarsdale store is one of the smaller Trader Joe's in the New York area, it was honestly twice the size of our Trader Joe's here. The prices are comparable, too, I was happy to see, because I had resolved on this trip to introduce my aunt to tuna steaks. They're just as reasonably priced as in Pittsburgh. We also picked up a guacamole kit (they have them in Pittsburgh, too, but we didn't know that at the time), sold in the produce section complete with two avocados, two roma tomatoes, an onion, a clove of garlic, a jalapeno and a lime.

Trader Joe's Wine Shop in Manhattan

We whipped it all up for dinner and it was mighty delicious. While most of the wonders of Trader Joe's can be experienced in Pittsburgh, there is one that yet alludes us—that wonder of wonders, that joy of joys... the Trader Joe's Wine Shop. Yes, in New York, Trader Joe's sells wine. I know what you're thinking, it's in New York so it's got to be expensive, right? Not so. We stopped at the Trader Joe's wine shop in Manhattan and found whole shelves of wine bottles for $4.99 and $5.99 a piece. But the crowing glory of them all? The Trader Joe's brand wine offered from Charles Shaw winery that can be had—any varietal—for $2.99 a bottle. Yes, that's $2.99 a bottle. They don't call it Two-Buck Chuck for nothing. And I'll tell you what, it's not bad. Certainly better than the Franzia boxes that my starving writer life style has me drinking. Please, PLCB, we beg of you, let Trader Joe's open a wine store in Pittsburgh!

And so, my trip to New York came to an end with promises that I would return sometime before 2010 (that is, I wouldn't wait so long to visit again as I did last time). On the train ride home I was warmed by memories of aunt-niece bonding, Two-Buck Chuck, and the knowledge that I had nine knock-off purses packed in my suitcase overhead.